Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
