I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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