Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
