that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
its liver damage thursday
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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