she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
