my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
