I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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