Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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