Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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