why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
