if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
She's the barista slut.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Randomize