Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize