are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
