He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
