two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
