Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
