I want to have your abortion
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
