At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
