im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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