in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Your dad touched me again.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize