And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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