We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
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