I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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