i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
