i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
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