i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
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