Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
