you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
