we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
