Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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