:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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