he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just forgot I was standing up.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Randomize
