on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize