4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
