I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize