Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
