So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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