I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
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I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
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We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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