i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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