Dual....:-)
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
