Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Randomize
