when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
