Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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