So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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