I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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