i don't like sucking hair
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
