Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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