there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
