OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Church boner. Awkwardddd
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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