His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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